Gambler

Why do I feel like a victim
When I know what I did?
I made a conscious choice
I even knew ahead of time
Some of the possible consequences
But I did what I did anyway
And still felt like I deserved
A different outcome
Than the one I got

Maybe I feel this way
Because I tire of the lack of
Success that has led me
To this point
Again another failure–
When will it end?

And still
I thought beforehand
Maybe things
Would be different this time
Because of probability–
I can’t lose
All the time right?

If I had not taken my chances
What then?
Would I have been better off?
Or would I have been
Lamenting just as much
After seeing someone else at the table
Get a full house?

I guess I like taking risks
Whenever the queen of hearts is involved