Apostrophe

Lost traveler found path back to the forest
Struggling metaphorist malnourished
Seeking refuge in this place
Hoping continued journey before it’s too late–

Things don’t seem to be working out
I’m not sure if I’m doing anything right
Too slow I’ve spent too much time toiling at one thing
Skulking within a barrow as if I’m a wight

I am useless in the company of peers
They plan schemes beyond my purview
Their talk thus regress to curse word-laden jeers
As they figure things out before progress made anew

Alas the trees forbid second chances
Once burned down nothing returns from ashes
Traveler returned to the homeland
Yet nothing ever goes as planned–

In the beginning I thought I could adapt
Toil at another’s cadence yet achieve greatness
But I can’t sync myself to the desired pace
My awkwardness causes much distress

Despite traveler wishes the intellect misses
At the altar where the sacrifice is offered
Incompetence and much desecration–

I struggle to find the craft here
For everyone else it’s business as usual
To the esoteric ways they adhere
Surviving this crucible no longer seems doable

The lambs have been misled
There is no slaughter today
Shepherds missing instead
Imposters parlay so that experts decay– 

Not sure anymore if I’m making a difference
Engaging just enough to meet the minimum
Centering myself barely contains the vociferance
No one must know I must keep mum

No one must know I’m going quietly
Giving my best I overthrow with anxiety
No one must know all this kept inside of me
How apropos metaphors must be denied to me
Muted words I thus faux no longer here–
Just a poetic apostrophe